The End!
by LZ
Summary: A lovely little parody fiction to make fun of the Sonic the Hedgehog game endings we all love to hate. Includes SA2B final ending and Shadow final ending. Now includes Team Rose Sonic Heroes ending... more to come
1. SA2B ending

**Disclaimer: no own sonic and co. and no own Yuji Naka and Sonic Team. (and no own McDonalds)**

**OMFGGGG! Rewritten :D**

Sonic and Knuckles ran into the empty lab. The ground was shaking uncontrollably.

"What's that...that vibration?" Knuckles shouted.

"Hey, wait... somebody's coming!" Sonic shouted.

Just then Rouge dropped down from the ceiling and faced the boys with a miserable look.

"You...? You haven't given up yet?" Knuckles demanded.

"It's all over for us..." Rouge said, ignoring Knuckles.

"What do you mean?" Knuckles asked.

"I just received a message from my boss..." Rouge said, "The Space Colony ARK is currently approaching Earth at an incredible velocity. It, probably... will impact Earth..."

Knuckles stared at her for a moment, "OH MY GOD! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" he screamed.

Then Professor Gerald flashed across the nearby computer screen. Knuckles turned to see, "What's that on the screen?" he asked through his hysterical sobs.

'_This is a death sentence for every human being on Earth. If my calculations are correct, the Space Colony ARK will impact the Earth in twenty-seven minutes, twenty-three seconds. All of you will be destroyed, along with your beloved planet Earth._' The professor said.

'_I plan to give you a taste of my revenge, once all the seven Chaos Emeralds are coll-' _

"Blah blah blah, what else is on?" Sonic asked holding a TV remote.

Rouge snatched the clicker from him and changed it back. '-_it cannot be disabled. All of you ungrateful humans, who took everything away from me... will feel my loss, and despair!_'

Amy rushed into the room, "What's going on here? Who is that?" she demanded.

"Professor Gerald Robotnik!" Everyone turned to see Eggman standing in the door, "One of the greatest scientific minds in the world, and my grandfather!"

"What?" Knuckles shouted, "I knew you were behind all this! Stop it right now, or else-"

"What? You'll cry?" Eggman teased.

"Leave him alone. It's not his fault he has a weak constitution." Sonic argued.

"Well, I'd have done this a long time ago if I had the chance anyway." Eggman said.

"What do you mean?" Sonic asked.

Eggman paused and stared at Sonic, "How are you still alive? We saw that capsule blow up you damn hedgehog!"

"Hey, loose the language, this game is rated E!" Sonic shouted.

"Well, whatever. Here take this." Eggman said handing Rouge a data disk.

"What's this?" Rouge asked examining it.

"This is my grandfather's diary." Eggman said.

"Whatever happened to just a simple book?" Amy wondered, "Everything is computerized nowadays."

Rouge ignored her and put the disk into a console and the contents were displayed across the screen.

Rouge began to read it to herself.

"Hello! We wanna hear it too!" Sonic shouted.

"Oh stop whining. It basically just says he's upset because he wanted the Ultimate Life Form to benefit mankind but the military came and wanted to destroy it… blah blah blah… colony shut down, Maria killed, fake accident, went crazy… made program on Earth so that when Shadow was released he activate it and take revenge on Earth. Oh, so that's why you released Shadow!" Rouge said.

"Why didn't you read it aloud? It was really cool!" Eggman pouted.

"Well since we have to save the Earth now there really isn't that much time." Rouge argued.

"Alright fine, the core of the Eclipse Cannon is now highly reactive and explosive." Eggman explained, "This is because of the energy of the Chaos Emeralds is overpowering it. If the colony collides with Earth, it will shatter into pieces like my grandfather predicted! That mad scientist!" Eggman added this last sentence with a laugh.

"That should be you, right?" Amy said angrily.

"We have to stop the Space Colony now!" Tails shouted.

Sonic stared at the kitsune, "When the hell did you get here?" he asked.

"E rated!" Tails reminded him.

"The Space Colony ARK's position may have shifted due to the amount of energy given off by the Emeralds. We have to stop the energy!" Eggman reasoned.

"But... how?" Tails wondered.

"Hmm, that's it. There is a way to stop the energy!" Rouge said excitedly. She turned to Knuckles who was now hugging the Master emerald and whimpering. She stared for a moment then took the Emerald, "We have to use this Emerald!" she shouted.

"NO GIVE BACK MY PRECIOUS!" Knuckles cried. Then he fell to the ground and started shaking.

"Oh Jesus, lets just get this over with." Everyone, minus Knuckles and Amy ran off to help.

"Ooh, I hate it when they leave me behind!" Amy shouted.

Then Shadow came in and saw Amy and Knuckles. He stared at Knuckles who was crying for his mommy.

"Look! It's Shadow!" Amy shouted pointing at him.

Shadow stared at her, "Who are you talking to? The Echidna who's having a seizure or me?" he asked.

Amy ignored him, "I've really gotta stop whining. Everyone's trying there best to help out, and so must I!" She ran up to Shadow, "Shadow, we need you! Please help us!" she shouted.

Shadow stared at her for a moment trying to reason why she was acting so strange, then he decided to ignore it and read his lines, "It's all going according to plan. There's no reason for me to help them. Besides, there's no way to save anyone." He said turning away from her and walking up to the window.

"There has to be! I know that people fight over the most trivial things. Some people may be selfish, like the professor said... but they're basically good, if they try their best and never give up on their wishes. They always have a reason to be happy, that's why you should help them out! Saving them is a good thing! Shadow, I beg you, please do it for them! Give them a chance!" Amy cried.

Shadow stared at her for a moment, "That's pathetic." he said, "Honestly, who writes this stuff anyway?"

"You're supposed to go into a flashback." Amy mumbled.

"Ugh… forget it. I'll help them if you just shutup!" he screamed. Then he ran out of the room to find Sonic and the others.

Amy glared after him, "I HOPE YOU FALL OFF THE SPACE COLONY!" she shouted after him.

Sonic was running up to the Core with Rouge seeing as Knuckles was still convulsing on the floor of the lab.

"What's that? It looks just like the shrine of the Master Emerald!" Rouge said.

"How do you know?" Sonic asked.

"If I stole the emerald I've obviously seen the shrine." Rouge said.

"Yeah, why didn't they show that in the beginning of the game?" Sonic wondered, he paused then snapped back to reality, "Either way, they probably designed the core like the shrine to harness the power of the Chaos Emeralds."

The two started running towards the shrine when suddenly Professor Gerald's booming voice rang out from nowhere: '_All of you ungrateful humans, who took everything away from me, will feel my loss and despair!_'

"Watch out, here it comes!" Sonic shouted.

"How do you know something is coming to attack us?" Rouge asked.

"Oh shutup and just watch out!" Sonic shouted.

Suddenly the Biolizard warped into the center of the room and roared ferociously.

"Good thing Knuckles isn't here, he'd have shit himself." Sonic said.

"E RATED!" Rouge shouted, "This must be the prototype of the Ultimate Life Form that was supposed to be encapsulated!"

"Leave this one to me."

The two looked behind them to see Shadow standing walking up to them.

"Shadow, what're you doing?" Sonic asked.

Shadow ignored him and approached the BioLizard, then he looked back, "I'll take care of this, while you run to get the Chaos Emeralds!"

"Look out!" Rouge shouted.

While Shadow wasn't looking the lizard swiped at him with his tail.

Shadow growled, "That was a cheap shot!" he screamed, and then he jumped on top of the lizard and started kicking the life support machine, "TERIAAAAA!"

Sonic and Rouge ran up to the shrine and climbed up the stairs. When they reached the top they found a place in the center for the Emerald and Rouge placed it there and waited for a minute. "Now what?" she asked.

"I think you're supposed to say something." Sonic said.

"Uh… Stop the Chaos Emeralds!"

The Emerald began to glow and spin rapidly. "Hey it worked!" Rouge cried truimphantly.

Behind them the Biolizard roared one last time while thrashing around desperately and then it disappeared in a flash.

"Is it gone?" Rouge asked.

Shadow jumped onto the platform with Sonic and Rouge, "Is that what... Chaos Control is?" he wondered.

"What kind of stupid question is that? You're the one who knows about Chaos Control." Sonic said.

"Hey, Chaos Control! That's an oxymoron!" Shadow said with a silly smile.

The vibrations continued, even worse than ever.

"Since we stopped the Chaos Emeralds, why is the Space Colony still on a crash course to Earth?" Rouge asked.

Then Eggman's voice boomed over the speakers: "The Prototype is still alive! He's controlling the Space Colony as it is falling to Earth! He has become one with the Space Colony, and is determined to keep it on its collision course!"

"Oh great." Shadow mumbled, "How many times am I gonna have to kill this thing before it actually dies?"

"Just once more." Sonic said cheerfully.

"How do you know? Maybe in some sort of fucked up sequel they'll ressurect it and we'll have to fight the damned thing all over again!" Shadow snapped.

"E RA- oh fuck this! Let's just go kill that bastard!" Sonic said gathering up the chaos emeralds.

"Can I be gold instead? Silver and red look really stupid. Especially on a hedgehog." Shadow pouted.

"You'll be whatever color your animators decide you'll be." Sonic said.

"NO FAIR!" Shadow pouted. After four minutes of arguing… 

Shadow and Sonic finally managed to change into their super forms, "This sucks…" Shadow mumbled.

"Don't start that again!" Sonic threatened.

"GET GOING! YOU ONLY HAVE ONE MINUTE LEFT!" Rouge screamed at the two bickering hedgehogs.

Shadow and Sonic chaos controlled to outside the colony where the BioLizard was dragging the colony towards Earth.

Sonic sped towards the lizard to kill it but realized Shadow wasn't following him. He looked back and saw Shadow was laughing hysterically.

"What's so funny?" Sonic asked.

"The Lizard's getting ass-raped by the colony!" Shadow shouted.

Sonic looked again and then started laughing too. "_What are you doing? The ARK is going to crash into the Earth!_" Rouge shouted frantically over the radio.

"Rouge! Look out the window! The lizard's getting raped!" Sonic said between his gasps for air.

"Hey!"

Sonic and Shadow stopped laughing and looked at the Biolizard who was glaring at them, "You can talk?" Sonic asked.

"Yes, I can talk!" it said in a raspy voice, "And I don't appreciate you making fun of me because the eclipse cannon is sticking up my ass."

"Hey, what if that thing goes off?" Shadow asked. The two hedgehogs started laughing once again.

The Biolizard roared angrily, "You won't be laughing once I destroy your precious planet!"

"_Sonic, Shadow! Aim for the red swelling area to damage him!_" Eggman's voice shouted over the radio, "_There's only 30 seconds before impact!_"

Shadow started laughing again, "Not only is it getting ass-raped it's got a hernia too!" he shouted.

"Oh forget this! I didn't get involved in this game to be made fun of." The lizard said angrily, "WHERE THE HELL IS MY AGENT?" There was a green flash and the Biolizard was gone and ARK back in place.

Sonic wiped tears of laughter from his eyes. Then randomly Shadow said, "Sonic! I figured out what the ultimate life form is… it might be you!"

Sonic looked back at Shadow who was trying to slit his wrists with a comb.

"WHAT?" he demanded.

"AAAAAAGH! THE SCRIPT! IT BURRRRNS!" Shadow screamed. Then he fainted and plummeted towards earth. Sonic tried to grab his wrist to save him but only managed to grab the ring around his glove which came off.

Sonic paused staring at the ring in his hands, "Poor bastard. The writers always had the advantage…" he mumbled sadly. Then he flew back to the colony where everyone was waiting for him.

_Back in the lab..._

Sonic came in and faced everyone.

"Where is Shadow?" Rouge asked.

Sonic hesitated, and instead of making Shadow seem like an idiot for his stupid lines just shook his head sadly.

There was a pause and then Sonic handed Rouge the ring that had been around Shadow's wrist.

"Do you really think... that the professor created Shadow to carry out the revenge on all those who live there, on Earth?" Rouge asked.

"Well… yeah. Didn't _you_ read the diary that proved it?"

Rouge stepped on Sonic's foot.

"OW! I mean… He was what he was. A brave and heroic hedgehog, who gave his life to save his planet. Shadow the Hedgehog..."

"I guess you're right..."

Eggman and Tails were staring out through the glass at the earth.

"As a child, I looked up to my grandfather because of all the great things he accomplished in his life. He was my hero, and I wanted to be a great scientist like him. But... did he really mean to destroy us?" Eggman wondered.

"I don't know. But what I do know is; we all did it together!" Tails cried joyfully.

Just then several audience members picked up Tails and threw him out the airlock for his idiotic lines where he exploded into a million bloody pieces. The fans cheered!

Knuckles was still convulsing on the ground.

"Knuckles get up! We're supposed to have a scene!" Rouge shouted kicking him.

Knuckles sat up, "Like a love scene?" he asked eagerly.

"No!" Rouge shouted, "Forget it! I'm outta here!"

Rouge stormed out of the room mumbling about stupid scripts.

Everyone shrugged and followed her. Sonic went last. At the doorway he paused and looked back, "Hey wait! Where are the chaos emeralds?" he shouted.

_Meanwhile in Japan…_

Yuji Naka and the Sonic Team sat in their conference room, "Good job guys. Sonic Adventure 2: Battle was a hit!" Naka said happily.

"Too bad we used up all our creative ideas. Now Sonic Heroes is going to suck." a writer said.

"Well, as long as people buy it we get the money, right?"

Then the door opened and everyone looked to see Shadow standing there in his super form and glaring at them angrily, "Oh Shadow. We were just talking about SA2B. I hope you're not too mad about some of the lines…" Naka said.

"HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME SAY SONIC IS THE ULTIMATE LIFE FORM!"

Down the hall the secretary heard the door slam and multiple screams of pain. She stood up to go see what the commotion was about but then an alarm clock on her desk went off, "Lunch break." she said happily and skipped off to McDonald's.

**Fin**


	2. Shadow ending

**Warning: Extreme OOCness and Ending Spoilers**

**Shadow the Hedgehog- the ending they didn't want you to see**

Shadow smiled as he looked around at the seven chaos emeralds hovering magically around him, "Finally! I've got all the chaos em-" suddenly he paused, "Strange… I'm getting some intense déjà vu. Have I said this before?"

"Well done Shadow!" A deep voice boomed. Shadow looked up to see Black Doom hovering in front of him, "Now our ritual can commence as planned- give me the chaos emeralds!"

"Um…" Shadow thought, "What ritual do you mean? It's not painful is it?"

"Shadow!"

Shadow looked back to see who had called his name and saw Sonic and the whole gang running up to him.

"What the fuck? I had to go through all these levels go get here and you guys can just magically appear on this damn comet? What's up with that?" Shadow pouted.

"Oh suck it up and just give _me_ the chaos emeralds!" Sonic said.

"Don't give them to Black Doom!" Eggman shouted.

"They're planning to destroy the planet!" Rouge added.

Black Doom let out a low chuckle, "Ignorant fools! We're here to save the humans from their own demise. We offer salvation!"

"What do you mean?" Shadow asked.

"Their greed, thirst for power, and affinity for betrayal has them on a path of self-destruction. Their actions will lead to extinction of their-"

"Cut the crap, Black Doom. Everyone knows that humans are destroying the Earth. You just want to kill us and suck out our guts!" Sonic argued.

"Mmmm guts… Uh… I mean… no that's preposterous!" Black Doom retorted. Then he looked back down at Shadow who had the emeralds still floating around him, "Now, let us begin our ritual of prosperity!"

The Chaos Emeralds flew up to surround Black Doom, "Hey! I worked hard to get those things! I get to keep them!" Shadow pouted stamping his foot.

Black Doom ignored him, "Chaos Control!" he shouted.

Suddenly there was a blinding green flash and the comet shook forcefully.

After a moment it stopped. "What was that? What just happened?" Amy asked.

"Those black creatures just warped the comet down the surface using Chaos Control!" Sonic shouted.

"For the love of God! We're not fucking black creatures! We're the Black Arms! Haven't you been listening at all during this god forsaken game?" Black Doom shouted angrily.

"So you just needed the emeralds to warp the comet down to Earth?" Shadow demanded.

Black Doom smiled (somehow), "Yep. The comet isn't fast enough to get through the atmosphere so we decided to use the emeralds. That's why I needed the professor's help."

Shadow's eyes widened, "WHAT?"

"The professor was in development of the ultimate life force, but he needed my help. So we made a deal... I helped him, and he promised to deliver me the seven Chaos Emeralds. That's how you were created, Shadow. You would help us do both!" Black Doom explained.

Shadow paused for a moment in thought, "YOU MEAN I WAS ONLY CREATED JUST TO FETCH YOU THE FUCKING EMERALDS? WHAT KIND OF FUCKING STUPID PLOT IS THIS?" he finally screamed falling to his knees from sheer anger.

"My grandfather betrayed his own people for research? For Black Doom?" Eggman demanded.

"Well we can't just stand here doing nothing!" Sonic shouted.

"That's what you think!" Black Doom said, "See, I've got this cool gas stuff paralyzes you earthlings. It smells kinda bad though."

"What? We're breathing it right now?" Tails asked fearfully.

"Uh… no I haven't released it yet." Black Doom said, "Just a second… hold on…"

PPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT

"Ooh, that was a wet one." Black Doom said lighting a match.

"EWWWWWWWWW!" Amy shouted, "That's disgusting!"

"Forget this! Let's crush this cosmic rock ball!" Knuckles shouted throwing his fist into the air. Then he froze.

"Oh shit…" Sonic mumbled as he froze. The others soon followed.

"Hey, it worked!" Black Doom shouted triumphantly, "And as it turns out, we do like to suck out your guts! Go my children, devour these savory dishes!"

Shadow looked up as the small black larvae came towards them, "Do I qualify as one of your children?" he asked hopefully.

"SHADOW!" Sonic shouted angrily.

"Oh right…" Shadow mumbled standing up. He stepped on one of the larvae crawling near him, "Sorry little 'bro." he mumbled. Then he looked up at Black Doom.

"Very well Shadow. I see this is how you repay me for creating you." Black Doom said angrily, "Well I brought you into this world, and I can take you out of it!"

"Oh stop with the parental threats." Shadow said exasperatedly.

Black Doom ignored him and flew off. "Come back here!" Shadow shouted running after him with his arms flailing angrily.

"HEY! ARE YOU JUST GONNA LEAVE US HERE TO GET EATEN!" Rouge shouted after him.

Shadow followed Black Doom all the way through the comet to a strange room where Black Doom stood with the Chaos Emeralds.

"Well done, Shadow. I didn't expect you to make it this far." He said, "But you don't understand. The future we offer is the only option for these humans."

"I've heard enough!" Shadow shouted, still walking towards him, "You're going down!"

"Oh Shadow, I thought you were different from the rest… but perhaps not." Black Doom said, "But we are more alike than you think. The same blood runs through our veins."

"What? Impossible- augh!" Shadow collapsed to his knees holding his head, "Just who are you?" he demanded.

"Oh, you don't know do you? You were created from my blood!" Black Doom said.

"Really?" Shadow asked.

"That's right. You are apart of me!" Black Doom paused and looked down to see Shadow hugging him.

"MOMMY!" Shadow cried happily.

"GET THE FUCK OFF ME!" Black Doom screamed.

_Meanwhile on ARK…_

Espio stood in the ARK research facility typing on the control panel. Charmy flew behind him impatiently as Vector looked over his shoulder.

"Are you in yet Espio?" Charmy asked.

Vector turned around and smacked Charmy, "WHAT'S MY NAME BITCH?" he shouted.

"V-vector!" Charmy cried.

"That's right. And you shutup so Espio can concentrate!" he said angrily. Then he turned back to Espio, "AND YOU! Get a move on you lazy bastard! All the data we recovered will be lost if you don't get in there fast!"

"Shut your mouth, Vector! I'm trying!" Espio said, still typing frantically.

Charmy flew up behind him, "That's it! I'll do it; get out of my way!" Charmy flew at the control panel rapidly and rammed into it.

The screen sparked slightly. Then nothing. Espio glared at Charmy, "What're you getting at?" he demanded, "You could've destroyed the whole-"

Just then there was a loud explosion and all three Chaotix were thrown against the wall. Where the control panel was, there was now a smoldering pile of ash.

Charmy's face grew pale, "NO! DON'T HURT ME!" he screamed flying away.

Vector pulled out a medieval flail and ran after the bee, "COME BACK SO I CAN SQUISH YOU AND PULL OFF YOUR WINGS!"

Espio sighed and rested his face in his hands, "So much for us saving the day…" he mumbled.

_Back on the comet…_

Shadow was now crying, "Mommy, why don't you love me?" he sobbed.

"OH SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Black Doom screamed. Then he flew up out of the comet, forgetting the chaos emeralds.

Shadow watched him go then looked at the chaos emeralds lying on the ground in front of him, "Well if my mommy hates me then I'll just have to teach her to love me!" he shouted collecting the emeralds.

The emeralds hovered around him once again and Shadow concentrated their power and managed to transform into Super Shadow! w00t!

Then he flew after Black Doom. Up in the sky Black Doom had transformed into his rather ugly real self: Devil Doom. Bum bum buuuuum!

"I gave you life, and yet you defy me? So be it! You shall pay for your ingratitude with relentless pain!" Devil Doom shouted as Shadow flew towards him.

Shadow dodged the building debris flying at him and flew right up to Devil Doom's face. He paused for a moment then poked him in the eye.

Devil Doom gave a shriek of pain, "AAAAAAAAAUGH! I'M BLIIIIND!" he screamed. Then he fell through the clouds to the ground.

Shadow watched him fall then smiled, "That was a lot easier than the SA2B final boss." He said. Then he paused in thought, "Hey, I just got a great idea."

He flew down to the comet and flew underneath it. "CHAOS CONTROL!" he shouted.

The comet disappeared in a flash of golden light. It reappeared beneath the ARK. A moment later the Eclipse cannon began to charge up. Then it fired and the comet exploded!

_Down on Earth…_

Tails stared up at the comet induced fireworks in the sky, "Yes! He did it! The Black Comet is destroyed." He shouted happily.

"That was SWEET!" Sonic shouted.

"I hope Shadow's okay." Rouge said.

"I'm sure he's fine. After all he _is_ Shadow." Amy said.

"Where's Knuckles?" Eggman asked.

"I didn't see him get off the comet…" Tails mumbled.

Just then a bloody red mass landed in front of them. "There he is!" Sonic said pointing at it.

They all stared for a moment then ran off.

_ARK…_

Shadow stood in the research facility staring out the window at the earth. He glanced at a picture of Maria and Gerald which he somehow had in his hand. "Goodbye, Shadow the Hedgehog." He mumbled solemnly.

Then he turned and threw the picture over his shoulder and headed towards the door.

Before he could leave it opened and Charmy ran in screaming. His wings had been torn off and he was bleeding profusely, "HELP HE'S CRAZY!" he screamed hiding behind Shadow.

Vector came in with a bloody flail and glared at Shadow, "Oh, so you're gonna protect the little squirt, are ya? Well then you'll just have to go down with him!" he raised the flail and charged at the pair as they screamed for mercy.

**Fin**


	3. Team Rose ending

**It's been so long since I've updated this! It feels good to finally be putting something up on this story. So, each Sonic Heroes team will be having their own ending. How far they get into their ending depends on how much I like the team and their levels and how many things I can think of to make fun of them. This particular team is full of idiots and hence, there are many jokes insulting their intelligence and ability to perform the simple task of getting through the final levels.**

**Enjoy

* * *

**

**Team Rose**

"_Mwhahaha! You fools must all have a death wish! Witness this invincible battle ship built by the hands of a genius; it's power unmatched throughout the universe!_"

Amy stood atop the the Egg Fleet staring down at the steep drop below her, "Alright, if you want a fight then you've got one! Let's get that bloated buffoon!" she cried.

Cream and Big ran forward to follow her but Big, being the huge piece of lard that he is, tripped and stumbled into Amy. The two of them went flying down the steep incline on their backs and flew off into the clouds.

Cream glanced up at Cheese for a moment then looked back, "I guess it's up to us, Cheese." she muttered in her squeaky voice. However, Cream was not the selected character so she was suddenly rocketed forward by an invisible force and went spiraling into the clouds after her friends.

_**Attempt Two...**_

Amy stood on the Egg Fleet rubbing her head, "Okay... We only have two lives left now so let's try not to kill ourselves." she said glancing back at Big.

"Me sorry." He grumbled.

"That's okay Mr. Big." Cream said with a smile, "We'll win this time!"

"Come on guys! We have to get to Eggman's ship and save our friends!" Amy shouted. She took off down the slope with Big and Cream in pursuit.

_Ten minutes later..._

Amy glared back at Big and Cream, "I can't believe I was paired with you two idiots." she mumbled angrily.

"Sorry we haven't even made it to the first checkpoint yet, Amy." Cream mumbled. Amy glared at the pair of them then groaned, "Come on. We should keep going before it gets dark." she said as she trudged along the metal exterior of an egg fleet ship.

Cream and Big followed, "Hey, how did we get up here anyway?" Big wondered aloud, "And wouldn't it have made more sense to just get onto the main ship first instead of going through all these levels?"

"Hush up!" Cream said, "You'll get thrown in the loony bin with Shadow."

_Meanwhile..._

Shadow was sitting in his little padded room wrapped up all cozy in his straight jacket mumbling something about this whole world being just a story.

_Awhile later on the Egg Fleet..._

Amy glanced down at the immobile fan sitting in front of her. "There must be a switch around here to activate this thing." she said looking back to Cream. She glanced around for a moment then pouted, "Where's Big?"

"I haven't seen him since the last checkpoint." Cream replied.

Amy groaned, "We'd better go find him. We can't continue without him." She trudged back down the path they'd just come. A few minutes later they came across Big hugging an eggbot.

"Look, Amy." he cried happily, "I finded Froggy!"

Amy glared at him, "Big, that's an enemy robot." she groaned exasperatedly.

Cream stared at the robot, "I can see how he made the mistake. It does look a bit like a frog." she said.

"NO IT DOESN'T!" Amy screamed, "Are you two going to take this seriously or not? I'm not going to let your silliness get in my way! If you two still want to find your friends then you can come along, otherwise I'll find my way alone."

"Sounds like someone's at their time of the month." Cream giggled.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Amy screamed tackling Cream. The pair of them flew over the side of the ship into the clouds. Big stared after them for a moment but then pulled out is umbrella and jumped after them, gently floating down through the clouds to his death with the other two.

_**Attempt 3...**_

"Okay okay..." Amy mumbled rubbing her temples irritably, "So we're back at the first checkpoint... our time is fifteen minutes and we still have a long way to go."

"Chao chao chao!" Cheese squeaked.

"Cheese says he's hungry." Cream translated.

"It can wait." Amy said as she started off, "We're going to find my Sonikku and we're not stopping for food."

As Amy continued along she heard Big shouting for help. As she looked back all she saw was Cream and Cheese. "Where did Big go?" Amy demanded.

The only response was Cheese burping up a large tuft of purple fur. Amy screamed in frustration, "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?" she demanded. Cream and Cheese stared at her fearfully as she went off on a long profane rant. Finally she turned to the two and shouted, "I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU TWO!" she pulled out her piko piko hammer, "PREPARE FOR PUNSIHMENT!"

Cream and Cheese screamed and ran off. Amy continued to chase them through the entire level. After about five minutes of running around Cream stopped and pointed, "Look, Cheese!" she shouted.

Amy paused in her violent rampage and glanced over to where Cream was pointing. Off in the distance they saw the shiny golden gleam of the goal ring. Amy's eyes lit up, "We're almost there!" she screamed grabbing Cream and Cheese's hands, "We have to hurry and find my Sonikku!" she ran towing the two of them with her.

However, as Amy was blundering her way over to the ring they were suddenly stopped by a large robot. Amy stared up at it for a moment in surprise and then glared back at Cheese, "I hope you're happy!" she said, "Now how are we supposed to beat this thing without Big?"

"Chao chao..." Cheese mumbled apologetically. The robot took aim and fired at the three of them. Amy screamed and dove out of the way but Cream and Cheese didn't get away in time and the laser hit them and sent them flying off the edge. They _might _have been able to fly back onto the ledge if the game hadn't made it so you had to actually take off from the ground to fly, but that's just the way things work, isn't it?

Now alone, Amy pulled out her hammer and readied to take on the robot, "If you stop me from marrying Sonic then there's going to be deep trouble, robot! Get outta my way!" She lunged at the robot with her hammer pulled back to strike. She started wailing on the robot with her hammer only to discover that it was holding up its shield.

"HA!" she shouted, "You can't beat me with that wimpy thing!" with that she leapt around the robot and started hitting it from behind... however this game is also retarded in the sense that even though the enemy's shield is small and wimpy and on the opposite side of your attack, you cannot cause it damage unless the shield is totally gone.

Too bad Amy didn't know this. As she hit the robot she wore herself out and as she stopped the robot turned around and blasted her. She flew backwards and skidded up to the goal ring. She smiled up at it and reached out a hand to grab it but unfortunately she didn't have any rings left.

"WAIT WHAT?!!!"

_**Team Rose mission failed.**_


End file.
